Psychopath's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Sonic - A New Enemy]

I suppose that everyone who has ever owned a computer regardless of when it was made, what operating system it runs and what kind of specs it has is a piece of shit since that's your one and only response to anyone that can't watch your craptacular, traced, meandering, stupid ass Flash movie.

No, I can tell you the real reason why your SWF file lags for everyone who watches it; it's caused by your blatant and obvious abuse of Movie Clip symbols, particularly when you copied and pasted them to fill in the background and when you layered on as many filter effects as possible when they're not needed. How stupid do you think your audience is when you blame ALL of their computers for the frame rate lagging behind?

The fact that you don't know what a preloader is and substitute it with just a "play" button is already enough to insult my intelligence but to blame the audience for the fact that you clearly reused the same graphic over and over without ever breaking the container is bullshit. Learn how to properly compress an SWF file you asswipe, motion tweening the same graphic to generate a fakey ass waterfall that looks like shit anyways does nothing but hinder the viewers ability to watch it. It doesn't help that the animation is sub-standard at best and fucking clown shoes at worst.

First and foremost, learn what a preloader is and learn how to use one. This very website hands them out for free under Community; Downloads; Flash Loaders and you now have access to a myriad of FLA files each containing a fully functioning, preprogrammed preloader. No augmentations needed, no additional Action Script necessary, just copy and paste that one frame to the first frame of your "Sonic - A New Enemy" FLA file, albeit you'll have to grab every frame on every layer and drag them all up by a frame, I digress.

You also need to learn how to optimize audio properly, first and foremost, stop using event mode. What you want for animations is stream mode fucktard, event mode is meant for sound effects in games, that's the reason why if you were to rewind and play it the previous play won't stop, it'll keep going as the new play through overlaps it. Since Event mode is Flash's default setting for audio, that leads me to conclude that you don't know how to optimize audio in the slightest, therefore I'll instruct you on how to fix the problem. Select a frame from the layer you have the music stored, go into your properties tab and you'll see a group of tabs next to the word "Sync". The drop down list to the immediate right of the "Sync" label determines how the audio is played, for an audio track for an animation you'll want to select the "Stream" option from this list as it's designed to play the audio and animation together thus not allowing them to breach their, as determined by you, synchronization.

Now I'm going to teach you how to optimize your audio since the stream option causes Flash to impose it's default audio compression features to any audio that's streamed. You'll want to go File; Publish Settings; select the Flash tab and now you have access to determine how Flash will compress your photos and audio upon creating the SWF file for your project. Click the set buttons for Audio Stream and Audio Event, select MP3 from the compression drop down list, select 160 kbps from the bit rate drop down list, select Best from the quality drop down list and deselect the check mark from the "Preprocessing / Convert Stereo to Mono" option. This will allow your audio to be heard at it's full capacity for quality.

You should probably save these settings as a profile so you don't have to repeat the process for each and every new project you start. At the top of the Publish Settings window you'll notice that between the tabs and the window bar that there is a drop down list labeled "Current profile". Next to that you'll see a group of buttons, after you've set your compression settings you'll want to select the plus sign for "Create new profile" and Flash will prompt you to label your new profile. After you've labeled your compression profile you'll want to select the "Import/export profile" button to the immediate left of the the "Create new profile" button. Clicking the "Import/export profile" button will produce a drop down list with two options, among these you'll want to select "Export", then Flash will prompt you to name the new file you're creating. After you're finished creating your new compression profile you can import it by selecting the "Import" option from the "Import/export profile" drop down list and automatically readjust the new project to your preferred settings.
You may also want to optimize the audio settings for the track itself rather than just every track in general, to do this you'll want to select the audio track in question from your Library tab, right click on the track and select properties. From here you apply the same settings as before, deselect "Convert stereo to mono", select MP3 for the compression setting, select 160 kbps for the bit rate settings and select Best for the quality setting.

If "no one wants to hear your complains or your opinions" then why did you ever upload it to a website that caters to exactly that? Because you're a fucking idiot, that's why. Judging from the 2.10 score, the almost perfect 0 review score and your view count only beneath half a thousand, there is absolutely no merit to saying "Just sit back and enjoy it like everyone else" because no one does enjoy this, did enjoy it nor will anyone ever enjoy it in the future you sack of shit.

Oh by the way fucktard, allow me to list of a group of villains from the Sonic franchise that aren't Hedgehogs; Chaos, the Biolizard, Ixis Naugus, Mammoth Mogul, Enerjak, Black Doom, Metal Sonic, Dr. Finitevus the Echidna, Dimitri the Echidna, Snively Kintobor, Kodos Lion, Uma Arachnis, Fiona Fox, Lightning Lynx, Sergeant Simian, Flying Frog, Predator Hawk, Sleuth "Doggy" Dawg, Drago Wolf, Nack the Weasel, Nic the Weasel, Bark the Polar Bear, Bean the Dynamite, Monkey Khan, Bomb, Heavy, Sleet the Wolf, Dingo, Coconuts the Monkey, Scratch, Grounder, Bokkun, Emerl, Dark Oak, Pale Bay Leaf, Black Narcissus, Yellow Zelkova, Red Pine and last but not least, every villain from the Dark Legion. Also, no, Silver was not a villain in Sonic '06, he was an anti-hero. Nazo is an unofficial villain who was eventually scrapped and never put into use to begin with so he's less canon than the comics and over abundance of animated shows. Only about two Hedgehog characters were ever actual villains, Scourge and Shadow. Against the thirty some odd villains I just listed that isn't very many Hedgehogs on the roster that actually matter worth a dick.

The story is bland and offers nothing new or valuable to the table other than a DeviantArt-esque original character who gets killed off within the first five minutes of his appearance because he's that fucking inconsequential to pretty much anything other than a wooden fence and he only serves as an excuse for the author to cum in his pants over Dark Sonic. There was no point, there was no purpose, there was no story, there was no plot, there wasn't a single God damn reason for this to even exist because it is so vapid and empty that it's already almost nonexistent anyway. I don't even get to know the villain's name before he gets killed off, that's how little he actually meant to anything. Oh wait, apparently his name is "Flame", I learned that from the fucking Author Comments... that's just fucking incompetent.

The voice acting in this is so God awful I refuse to believe that there's more than one voice actor to this. Actually, I retract my statement because the voice acting roster is comprised of the author's family members so it's no wonder the voice acting is a rolling ball of shit. Here's a freebie, don't combine your homebrewed voice acting talent with Microsoft Sam and actual audio clips from a television show because that actually made it worse because it lacked consistency. Even at my worst which would be Evil Dead Ejaculation, I never resorted to lifting audio clips from Army of Darkness to supplement the voice acting because I'm not a pair of fucking clown shoes.

Do you even realize how utterly bad this is? When a couple of spam crews can do better than you in every regard and they have, you should seriously consider upping your game because being outdone by the Star Syndicate and Faggot Federation is beyond sad.

Seriously though, could you be any more thin skinned? You know you're pathetic when you resort to ad hominems in saying "In fact, I'd like to see some of your submissions." whenever receiving critique. Name an entire district of office buildings where none of them have windows, I'll await your answer because considering how you treat backgrounds there's no excuse to not just copy and paste the same yellow brick of a Movie Clip Symbol in a vertical by horizontal row over an even bigger grey brick.

By the way, stop uploading clips from this one animation and take down the other two you've already uploaded, what you're doing is asinine. No one wants to see individual clips from an already unwatchable animation especially when nothing's been done to change their overall shit quality.

JamalF11X responds:

LOL nice essay.
Now listen here you little bitch. You're a fucking pussy and people like you are the scum of the Earth. Now most people rate it 3 stars. Only unsatisfied little shits like you give zeros to people just to piss them off. Nowadays not everyone has shitty computers like you. This flash file runs perfectly on my computer and on all the laptops I have.And my flash is made perfectly and runs smoothly on all my laptops. You're gunna just have to accept the fact that your computer sucks, and realize that people who complain that the animation lagged are the ones with shitty computers. Sounds don't overlap in event mode and you're a dumbass, not everyone uses stream mode for music, I have tried it before and its not that great. Event mode works just fine. The plot was designed well, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it. I know what a preloader is, I just didn't feel like putting one. The waterfall was very smooth and beautiful, you're just another faggot that is hard to please. You want to find buildings with no windows? Here's a suggestion, goto Google and search in images for buildings without windows. I doubt that there wouldn't be any. I think you have a problem.

There's something wrong with you. I uploaded it on Newgrounds simply just for people to watch and because its a flash website, I wouldn't give two shits what others think of my animations.
Why is the rating a 2, its because theres so many little bitches on the internet like you that are hard to impress due to the fact that they continuously compare solo animations to projects designed professionally by anime industries.
As a matter of fact, there are many people that actually enjoy and appreciate my animations, from online, university student groups, friends, animators, children, so you're completely wrong by saying that no one enjoys this. It doesn't lag, only the people that comment and complain that it lags are the ones that own shitty computers. If we banned people like you from rating flash animations to a 0, the rating for this flash would be at least a 3.
There are people that appreciate and love my work, and are impressed by it. And there's always bitchy faggots like you online that complain and try to piss people off, so go fuck yourself.

The reason I made Flame into a hedgehog is because hedgehogs and echidnas are far more interesting than robots and those other animal characters you've mentioned.
It was not to debate whether or not villians in the sonic series are hedgehogs or robots. Stop thinking crooked, bro you're side fucked as hell, and I feel sorry for useless people like you in this world.

But from what I know, you are a little
pussy hiding behind a computer screen trying to act tough and bash other people's animations because you have no life.
Clown shoes! You're a clown bro, and I think you belong to a side fucked clown family. The name Flame the Hedgehog is a professionally designed,
it sounds as if it has been created by Sega.
By the way, I have looked at your submissions, and they're a pile of shit. You can't draw well, which is why you used pixel sprites to cover up your shame. Even when you did draw characters, they are so poorly drawn and they looked like shit that I can wipe my ass with. As a matter of fact, its funny how you think that your pile of shit is better than my flash, while at the same time you are trying to teach me how to animate.

I do take critique from many people online, and that is how I improve my skills. I don't take bullshit advice from useless ignorant pussies like you that just try to show off that your better than others by insulting their animations just to get attention and respect and I don't give a fuck about your opinions. I'll continue to upload what I desire.

By the way, Who the fuck are you to call my family shit, you don't know me.
You are a pussy, and if you actually lived near me and said that to my face,
I would crack your fucking skull you little bitch.

[Looking for a Co-Animator]

I get the strong feeling that whatever sap decides to buddy up with you is gonna end up doing all the work and you're going to take credit for said sap's work. It wouldn't be the first time I'd seen that happen.

TwistedMation responds:

dude wtf man? I'm NOT such a person. Also Animating is the only work i really LOVE doing. Why... tell me WHY should i let others do the work and take all the credit??? I am just looking for someone who got the same interest like me. A person who also animates, A person i can help, a Person who can help me and so on... srsly you are really... how should i say... distrusting? Let me tell you something:
I love doing all the work of my animations, i love every animation (no matter if its funny, sad, with much action or just stupid) cuz it gives me the feeling i'd done something really epic (Even its not even a bit good). Also: If someone buddy up with me, i won't let him even make MUCH work. It should be at least 80% Created by MY Hands and not by other hands or people. I was looking for someone to run a Animating-duo channel on youtube and on Newgrounds. You can't know it but i ALWAYS did my stuff alone, i NEVER even let another Person doing stuff for me. But I (!) was the one who always helped other and made their stuff for them. And srsly... If you're really that distrusting... then please get some help... It was just a nice little idea of me... and now i'm so angry....... rlly... you don't even wanna know what i'm thinking about you right at the moment... Just... just go... srsly....

[I'm All Alone]

I would tell you that this belongs in the audio portal but you clearly already know that seeing as how you have submissions in the audio portal. Since you didn't categorize it correctly it no longer merits honest or fair critique because this isn't where it fucking belongs.

What's worse is that you had to augment the liquid idiocy with that fucktarded MP4 player. You could at least do well enough not to insult my intelligence by learning how Flash works and insert your song into a SWF file before uploading but you had the gall to upload a still frame from MS Paint in Windows Movie Maker. It's not even like you took to animating something in MS paint as an animation challenge, it's one frame, an album cover no less. I could be a solid black screen for all I could care.

Back in the day a song without animation would've gotten deleted so fucking fast half the people bee lining to zero bomb it wouldn't have even gotten the chance to score their blam point. Of course it's gonna pass anyway, most shit does, which is why I'm writing the review to begin with because I know this shit is gonna pass and you're gonna get to read it and all the reviews bashing you are gonna make you wish you never came to this site to begin with because we're a group of mean poopy heads.

Let me ask you something, if you're not going to acknowledge how the system is meant to be used then why should I acknowledge your work and the quality of it? Get your shit in gear, take this down and do it right fucktard.

[Newgrounds Portal: Alive]

This is not a review, this is a vlog made in the vain attempt at making a review.

Making reviews of Flash movies in the same capacity as the Nostolgia Critic or AVGN and then uploading them to Newgrounds is not a bad concept and it's also not a bad use for the Newgrounds player as such a concept would actually give it some legitimate purpose for existing but your execution of said concept was terrible.

I don't want to sit through two minutes of nothing while you watch a Flash movie before you actually start critiquing it, I also don't want to hear you murmur, stutter, stammer and struggle to formulate that opinion into a sentence before I actually get to hear said sentence. Those are things that should have been cut out in post production but I can plainly see that post production was not even a concept to you while filming this video on what I can only guess is a web cam.

If you're going to do this the very least you could do is organize your opinions by writing a script, employ use of editing software to cut out every bit where you fumble one of your lines and show the viewer footage of the content subject to critique. Remember, Windows Movie Maker 2.0 is free and so is Hypercam and yes, it is sad and pathetic that those are the tools I'm suggesting to improve your show with.

[Let's Play Ib~ Part 1]

Oh wow.

This right here just goes to show how much of a motherfucking stupid idea the NG video player really is. Not only are people using it to upload their songs to the FLASH portal instead of the AUDIO portal but now they're uploading their fucking let's plays too. All the useless garbage that nests on Youtube is now infesting Newgrounds.

Rule of thumb; if you can't format FLV files and import them into Flash or you don't know how to embed a Youtube video into a SWF parent file, you don't upload Youtube related shit here because you didn't pay your dues in knowing how Flash works.

I love how this is how the staff decided to prioritize server resources, a SWF file which is in HD by default can only get up to 20 megabytes of space but any given piece of pixelated shit can get up to a gigabyte at 240p. We're not supposed to use sprites anymore but a let's play of a game? Pfffft! Wave that shit through, it uses our Youtube knock off player.

They could have spent their time fixing all the broken shit about the site but no, making every effort at tailgating Youtube was clearly the better option. "I mean it's not like site was ever capable of supporting video anyway so this is a clear improvement--" Numa Numa; that's all I need say.

Look, I understand that the intended purpose of this player was to give publishing access to authors of different mediums such as stop motion, 3D animations and... MS Paint animations... but it has been exploited for stupid shit in the past and it will continue to be exploited in such a manner, no matter how many songs you remove from the portal.

This is worse than shovelware, because at least shovelware entails actual programming on the authors part. This is just garbage. Anything that uses this player should be screened by moderators before it's even allowed to enter the Judgment phase. That's how bad this is.

I would apologize to you EternalFlame but this simply doesn't belong here.

[LLUA - Latest track]

I would tell you that this belongs in the audio portal but you clearly already know that seeing as how you have submissions in the audio portal. Since you didn't categorize it correctly it no longer merits honest or fair critique because this isn't where it fucking belongs.

What's worse is that you had to augment the liquid idiocy with that fucktarded MP4 player. You could at least do well enough not to insult my intelligence by learning how Flash works and insert your song into a SWF file before uploading but you had the gall to upload a still frame from MS Paint in Windows Movie Maker. It's not even like you took to animating something in MS paint as an animation challenge, it's one frame, an album cover no less. I could be a solid black screen for all I could care.

Back in the day a song without animation would've gotten deleted so fucking fast half the people bee lining to zero bomb it wouldn't have even gotten the chance to score their blam point. Of course it's gonna pass anyway, most shit does, which is why I'm writing the review to begin with because I know this shit is gonna pass and you're gonna get to read it and all the reviews bashing you are gonna make you wish you never came to this site to begin with because we're a group of mean poopy heads.

Let me ask you something, if you're not going to acknowledge how the system is meant to be used then why should I acknowledge your work and the quality of it? Get your shit in gear, take this down and do it right fucktard.

stevemankle responds:

Dude, Have a wonderful evening ..... Seriously you have made my night, Theres a music video I uploaded for you, Its called violent outbursts of rage, Oh wait, You already seen thats right, Fuck off

[Thor's Hammer]

Your fucking background loops suck.

Wariatadi responds:

thanks i'm not blind, that's becaouse i tried to add something more not only loop.

[Saved]

Really? You're comparing Christianity to factory production? That's really the best you could do? For a minute I thought you were actually going to give social commentary or tell a real story but the best you gave was a primitive comparison between Christians and drones.

Suffice to say that I'm not at all impressed by 3D renderings nor am I impressed by motion tweening, that just highlights the cheapness of it all.

Speaking of being cheap, if you're going to critique Christianity, write some actual critique, because when you outright compare Christianity to factory production and the people who maintain the faith to zombies, you make yourself and other atheists alike out to seem just as immature and cheap as those who think atheism isn't a legitimate belief structure but rather a vain attempt made exclusively by teenagers to seem cool and rebellious and that it's impossible for someone to hold actual dissenting viewpoints on Christianity and in a way, by doing this in the way you have, you're giving them merit to say that because that's how you're making the situation appear.

[Bioshit Infinite]

This is terrible.

It's like nobody makes parodies by virtue of the fact that they have a joke about the content they want to share anymore but rather because they're somehow obligated to make said parody, like an alimony payment. A parody shouldn't exist purely on the merit of nit picking the newest or most well received content for the sole benefit of stirring up controversy and drawing attention to one's self as a result of being a contrarian, which is what you're clearly doing even despite your claim to have initially enjoyed the game in the description.

I say this because the jokes are virtually empty, meandering and don't appear to have any real aim. It's almost like you didn't play the game but found plot footnotes of it online or just read a review, if I didn't know better by means of the description, I would debate this to be true by the merit that of all the other bizarre and questionable things about the game to choose from, you chose to satirize the fact that Booker punches buttons and that Elizabeth has a problem with wanton murder. Those aren't exactly far fetched concepts that would come with flaws in logistics, hardly the stuff of parody.

Here's a joke, they start riding the sky rails, question the logic of riding steel beams with hooks in a place where the buildings keeping them stationary actively shift apart from one another and how, for that reason, it'd be impossible to keep the sky rail system intact for more than an hour. Then one of the buildings the sky rail is connected to disconnects from the town and starts floating away, ripping the sky rail apart, this is followed by Booker and Elizabeth falling off the broken end and falling to their deaths.

Hell, maybe you could write a joke about Comstock having problems with controlling Songbird and one of his subordinates question the merit of employing a giant anthropomorphic bird to do his bidding.

There, I already shat out two better premises for jokes than "Do you have to punch every button there is?" off the top of my head.

[Marmalade - Hobbit]

Why does Gandalf the White make an appearance in the Hobbit?